Attachment E. CUES safety card_AIAN participants

Oyate’ The People Education Card for Healthy Marriage and Relationship Education Programs

Safety card content for review:

Panel #	Panel content
Cover  slide	OYATE’ THE PEOPLE
1	Does your relationship honor Oyate’ traditions and cultural practices? In balanced, healthy relationships, partners: Respect each other, their family and friends, animals, and the land Use kind and loving words and actions Acknowledge and value the other’s decisions and opinions Appreciate the other’s traditions, culture, and spirituality Honor each other’s path as equal and as important as theirs Oyate’ (as one of the people) means we all deserve to be honored by partners who listen and support one another in a good way.
2	Conflict Happens All relationships have conflict, but sometimes, it can cause lasting harm. In abusive relationships, a person: Shames or humiliates the other Controls where the other person goes and how they spend their money Spies on the other person Hurts or scares the other with their words or actions  Makes the other engage in sexual behaviors when they don’t want to Keeps the other person from their job or school Uses cultural abuse, i.e., blood quantum, or withholds access to ceremonies and/or gatherings These experiences are common. Most people know someone who has been hurt by a partner or caregiver in their lifetimes. If something like this is happening to you or a friend, call or text the hotlines on this card.
3	We are Sacred Domestic and sexual violence were not originally part of the Oyate’ traditional Native Culture or ways of Tribal shared living. Women were honored as the givers and protectors of life; men were warriors and providers. These roles give honor and sacredness. Children represent our futures for the next seven generations. Our traditions, ceremonies, songs, and prayers respect the mind, body, spirit, and integrity of all people.
4	Helping a Friend or Family Member Even if you haven’t experienced abuse in your relationship, chances are you know someone who has been abusive or has been abused. You can: Share with them that they are not alone Offer encouragement and support Give them this card and say: “Hey, someone gave this to me. It has ideas on places you can go for support and things you can do to have a stronger and safer relationship.” When you help others, it helps you too!
5	Difficult Family History Many people (1 in 4) grew up in homes where there was abuse or other difficult situations. Maybe someone was hurting you or someone you love. Maybe you were worried about where you would live or having enough food to eat. Maybe your family couldn’t care for you how they wanted to, or they weren’t around. Maybe you or your family were prohibited from practicing your sacred cultural traditions or experienced separation. Childhood can be painful, but healing is possible.
6	Stronger You There are things you can do to feel stronger and to help you heal from past harm. Focus on empathy and not self-blame for your childhood experiences. Talk it out with someone you trust. Embrace your individual, community, and cultural strengths and values to help you heal. Move your body - it calms the brain and body and helps you feel better.  Breathe deeply and slowly. Go for a walk, splash cold water on your face, be aware of negative thoughts, and change the way you talk to yourself. Identify safe connections in your community, which may include friends, cultural healers, elders, family, health care providers, or other supportive professionals.
7	Safety Planning If your partner is hurting you, it is not your fault. You deserve to be safe and treated with respect.  “Safe” looks different for everyone. Here are some things that can help:  Remember what you have done in the past that has worked to keep you safe.  Prepare an emergency kit with money, a phone charger, keys, medicines, birth certificates, and vaccination records in case you have to leave quickly.  Talk to people in your life who can help you get safer. Call the hotline numbers included in this card.
8	You Can Change If you have been abusive in your relationship, you can choose to change your behavior and heal from past harm. ✔ Learn more about what abusive behaviors are, including emotional, financial, and sexual abuse. ✔ Look at yourself honestly and take responsibility for your behavior. ✔ Get help - there are programs that can support you in changing. Change can be hard; it requires seeking new pathways, thinking, responses, and directions. But all your relationships will benefit, and you will feel better about yourself.
Info  slide	The National Domestic Violence Hotline is confidential, open 24/7, and has kind staff who can help you develop a plan to be safer.  Stronghearts Native Helpline: 1-800-799-7233 The National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call: 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233)  Text: “Start” to 88788 Visit the website: www.thehotline.org  Text trained counselors about anything that’s on your mind:  Crisis text line: www.crisistextline.org  Text “START” to 741741 ©2024 Futures Without Violence. All rights reserved.  This card was developed with funding from the Office of Family Assistance under contract number 47QRAA19D004U with the Office of Planning, Research, and Evaluation, Administration for Children and Families, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.